Default REGISTER-before-connect and email-required to ONHEADmain

These knobs were opt-in (env unset = off) for the irctest harness'
benefit; the harness exercises both branches and is happy to set the
env explicitly.  But for the hosted papod deployment that papoweb is
moving towards, we definitely want both:

- REGISTER before connect: web clients can create an account in one
  CAP/NICK/USER round-trip instead of completing the IRC handshake
  twice (register, disconnect, log in).

- Email required: enables password recovery and abuse signal; cost
  is one extra field at signup.

Invert the env-var sense so production picks up the secure defaults
with no env tweaks; tests that need the old behavior pin
PAPOD_REG_BEFORE_CONNECT=0 / PAPOD_REG_EMAIL_REQUIRED=0.  The irctest
controller and papoweb's integration harness are updated separately
to pin "0" explicitly so a future default flip doesn't silently change
which branches they exercise.

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